Friday, June 27, 2008

Messy Headed

Last night/this morning my head was full of weird, inexplicable dreams. In one I was driving around in a fancy sports car with Mary J. Blige. She started crying and telling me how much she loves me and how much my friendship means to her. I paused, trying to come up with the right words in response and said "I want to tell you I love you too but I've said those words to so many people and then had them used against me as a weapon." Then we both cried and promised to never do that to one another. We drove some more until we accidentally drove into an area where drivers were practicing for a race. We took a side street and got stuck in the mud in front of a seemingly abandoned house that I somehow knew contained a rifle-wielding nutball who would shoot us if we spent too much time on his property. We got out of the car and attached this tow truck type mechanism to her bumper and then a naked, younger Tom Hanks laid on it and acted as a human anchor. When he got up he turned into my boss and I was distressed at how appealing I found my boss' genitalia.

After getting up to pee around 5:40 a.m. I fell asleep again and had another dream that I was waiting in a subway station with my co-worker Kelly, who had much longer hair and hippieish clothing and was dancing around all spazzy. The train seemed to be taking forever to arrive and I started to see if I could find a schedule when Kelly darted down to the other side of the platform and I had to chase after her to see why. When I got there she was huffing smoke out of a large, clear plastic bag and giggling at me making weird faces. I turned and looked across the platform and saw some transit workers trying to smash some huge cockroaches on the wall with these oversized, metal spatulas.

The dream shifted and I was in the facilities office at work. Scott and Tom were standing over Scott's desk where a white rat with black spots like a cow was sitting. They sprayed it with this red powder that somehow immobilized it and then tried to hit it with a hammer but either kept missing or didn't hit hard enough to do any damage. I started to back away out of the twin fear of rats in general and not wanting to see it's guts smashed all over the desk when, in what seemed like my actual real life, I felt a finger tracing it's way up my spine on my bare back. I awoke with a start, having been asleep with my back to my bedroom door, surprised to see no one was standing there at all.


At 6/27/2008 6:34 PM , Blogger Scot Colford said...

Chris, I'm sorry. Mary called. She doesn't know you and is sorry if she led you on.

Mwah. x

At 6/28/2008 12:13 AM , Blogger ohnochriso said...

I'm more concerned about Tom Hanks showing up at my door with no clothes on.


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