tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-102220532024-03-14T02:40:17.512-07:00Ballad of a Ladymanohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.comBlogger381125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-61246958134356654222009-12-30T23:41:00.000-08:002009-12-30T23:42:54.065-08:00New BlogNot doing so much with this one now. But I started a project where I am writing letters to my father who passed away last year. Feel free to check it out: <a href="http://deardadblog.blogspot.com/">http://deardadblog.blogspot.com/</a>ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-74457804758975399952009-05-07T21:51:00.000-07:002009-09-21T14:23:44.347-07:00What's It All About, Chriso?Oh my blog, how I have neglected thee. Which is not a surprise. As soon as I was accepted to the full time cosmetology program at <a href=http://www.cintaaveda.com Target="_New"><b>Cinta Aveda Institute</b></a> I knew my presence here would fade significantly. What I didn't realize is that my desire to be present here would also follow suit. It's particularly interesting because my life is currently fuller and more exciting than it's been in the longest time. My time is pretty much consumed by school and <a href=http://www.ex-bf.com Target="_New"><b>my band</b></a>. And since those are both two things I love a lot I am spending tons of time doing fantastic, fun, thrilling and challenging things. So why aren't I writing about it more? <br /><br />I was trying to document my beauty school experience for awhile in my Livejournal but I quickly lost the focus and drive to do so. It felt like I was trying to process everything into this format as soon as it happened but it ended up feeling kind of false; like I was trying to frame it in a way that was entertaining or consumable for a reader. But really, all I wanted to write was "OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, I CAN'T BELIEVE I GET TO DO THIS EVERY DAY, IT'S SO AWESOME. ALSO I AM SO TIRED." And that is still how I feel most of the time. And that's not all that stimulating of a read, is it? Sure, I could work at making it one, but that doesn't hold much sway for me right now.<br /><br />I don't want to put down anyone who keeps a blog; even a blog that I might think is a as boring or pointless as the day is long. Because I think writing about things, expressing yourself and sharing your thoughts is always a great process to undergo. But I also think that there can be times in one's life when one is too busy living to write about it. And I think that is a lot of where I am at right now. I have rarely felt as in the present as I do lately. Not that I never reflect on the past or contemplate the future. But it's usually about things like "Oooh, I wonder what hair services I get to do at school tomorrow" or "I can't wait till the new album is finished". It's all very much focused on things that I am currently involved in and excited about. And things that I don't feel like endlessly processing through this particular filter. This is a similar feeling I had when I ran out of steam for writing zines. (Although there were other mitigating circumstances that were souring me on that genre altogether) I started to feel like I was trying to force my life experiences through that specific filter instead of just fucking living. And I really am not trying to insult you if you faithfully maintain a blog. Or several. It's just where I am at right now and it feels worth sharing. And hey, if you're really tied to blogging, maybe see how it feels to take a few weeks off from it. Just give it a try.<br /><br />In the meantime, I am doing hair and making music and feeling like the luckiest motherfucker just about every day. I highly recommend finding a situation that makes you feel the same. It rules.ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-15448319166580184482009-05-01T23:05:00.000-07:002009-05-01T23:12:21.112-07:00Ex-Boyfriends Recording Blog!My band, <a href=http://www.ex-bf.com Target="_New"><b>Ex-Boyfriends</b></a>, have started a blog about recording our third album. Go check it out and follow along on all of our wacky misadventures!<br /><br /><a href=http://exbfrocks.blogspot.com/ Target="_New"><b>http://exbfrocks.blogspot.com/</b></a>ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-40654824418729524862009-04-06T07:27:00.001-07:002009-04-06T07:31:07.762-07:00Finished<a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3416801621/ Target="_New"><img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3632/3416801621_5e8a251ae5.jpg></a><br /><br />My memorial tattoo for my Dad is done now. And I fucking love it so much. Tattoo by <a href="http://www.blackandbluetattoo.com/artists/clio/" target="_New">Clio at Black & Blue</a> who also did my Athena piece. She is the shit. You need to get inked by her.ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-35287799802203239992009-03-03T23:59:00.000-08:002009-03-04T00:00:37.565-08:00Riot Grrrl is Turning Over In Its Metaphorical GraveAll thanks to the idiotic ramblings of the Vivian Girls. <br /><br /><div class="uiplayer"><lj-embed id="146"><br /><object type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="384" height="216" data="http://player.uncensoredinterview.com/e/10128.swf"><param name="movie" value="http://player.uncensoredinterview.com/e/10128.swf"></param><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true"></param></object><br /></lj-embed><div class="attribution"><a href="http://www.uncensoredinterview.com/artists/439-vivian-girls">Vivian Girls</a>: <a href="http://www.uncensoredinterview.com/vlogs/10128-vivian-girls-fish-out-of-water-sometimes">Fish Out of Water...Sometimes</a>.</div></div><br /><br /><div class="uiplayer"><lj-embed id="147"><br /><object type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="384" height="216" data="http://player.uncensoredinterview.com/e/10132.swf"><param name="movie" value="http://player.uncensoredinterview.com/e/10132.swf"></param><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true"></param></object><br /></lj-embed><div class="attribution"><a href="http://www.uncensoredinterview.com/artists/439-vivian-girls">Vivian Girls</a>: <a href="http://www.uncensoredinterview.com/vlogs/10132-vivian-girls-just-write-a-good-song">Just Write a Good Song</a>.</div></div><br /><br />Sure, Kathleen Hanna may have said "like" about 100 times per interview. But she said it in the context of discussing radical feminism and then turned around and helped create amazing songs like "Double Dare Ya", "Rebel Girl" and many others. From what I can glean, Vivian Girls make shambolic, reverb-drenched indie pop with 60s overtones (so! original!) and talk shit about everyone who isn't a part of their white, hipster world. How fresh! I love when they talk about normal people as if they're SO outsider and other and odd. When all I see are 3 hipster white girls who pretty much seem like every other mainstream high school mean girl but somehow just dress a little kooky.ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-18401285952906724972009-02-24T21:55:00.001-08:002009-02-24T22:41:22.508-08:00So FarMy memorial tattoo for my Dad, 3/4 of the way finished. Tattoo by <a href="http://www.blackandbluetattoo.com/artists/clio/" target="_New">Clio at Black & Blue</a> who also did my Athena piece. The symbol alongside the heart is a Marines symbol. My Dad really loved his time with the Marines and I felt like it would appropriately symbolize him. I will post the finished results when it's done in a few weeks. I'm really happy with how it's turning out so far. You really should get some work from Clio if you live in the Bay Area, she's fucking awesome. And her rates are really reasonable right now but bound to go up in the near future.<br /><br /><a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3308643336/ Target="_New"><img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3427/3308643336_a49f227792.jpg></a><br /><br /><a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3307812207/ Target="_New"><img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3573/3307812207_44b1e97e8b.jpg></a><br /><br /><a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3308643474/ Target="_New"><img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3409/3308643474_e62e472de4.jpg></a>ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-90359969589481563082009-02-01T15:17:00.001-08:002009-02-01T15:17:20.623-08:00Wow. Just, wow.<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/28NRj0BHyI4&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/28NRj0BHyI4&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-79968923200366714482009-01-21T22:47:00.000-08:002009-01-21T22:48:37.196-08:00A Cartoon About The Mission<a href="http://www.marriedtothesea.com/"><img alt="Married To The Sea" src="http://www.marriedtothesea.com/012209/subject-to-scowling.gif" width="400" height="409" border=0></a><br /><a href="http://www.marriedtothesea.com">marriedtothesea.com</a>ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-87727369765520439462009-01-21T22:37:00.000-08:002009-01-21T22:39:48.028-08:00An Average Day<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9Vk14M4856hNYRJHgjgQfj8xtiuNR5DqC5viEkGb4aVtdlCDwClGidPUuOHa_hTVDFEy5lSCauwH1vNkPPU4-r-xeNn2eJzzMbuVYVV7CbnZYUTLWJj0v5JenBklDrBy8t0OpaA/s1600-h/IMG_3938.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9Vk14M4856hNYRJHgjgQfj8xtiuNR5DqC5viEkGb4aVtdlCDwClGidPUuOHa_hTVDFEy5lSCauwH1vNkPPU4-r-xeNn2eJzzMbuVYVV7CbnZYUTLWJj0v5JenBklDrBy8t0OpaA/s400/IMG_3938.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5294004094000962690" /></a>ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-70770124246933822282009-01-20T09:01:00.000-08:002009-01-21T22:33:40.369-08:00FINALLY!!<img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3527/3212396111_f835e1f654.jpg Width=400 Height=275>ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-51410737692562033642009-01-14T19:19:00.001-08:002009-01-14T19:19:34.788-08:00Fucking Finally<a href=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2009/01/14/BAJE15A6O2.DTL Target="_New"><b>Johannes Mehserle, the BART cop who shot and killed Oscar Grant was arrested and is being charged with murder after waiving extradition</b></a>. <br /><br /><i> Alameda County District Attorney Tom Orloff said today that Mehserle had been charged with murder because the evidence showed that Grant was the victim of an unlawful, intentional killing.<br /><br />The evidence, Orloff said, included witness statements and video footage that has been widely aired on television and the Internet, prompting broad outrage.<br /><br />In addition to those videos, Orloff said BART had obtained camera footage that has not been seen by the public and proved to be "very valuable."<br /><br />"From the evidence we have, there's nothing that would mitigate that to something lower than a murder," said Orloff...</i><br /><br />And to further quote:<br /><i>BART board member Lynette Sweet, who called for Chief Gee and BART General Manager Dorothy Dugger to lose their jobs because of how the initial investigation was handled, called the arrest "a great start."<br /><br />"I just hope that this is for real and that it didn't happen on the eve of this huge rally just to diffuse anger," Sweet said in an interview. "Let's hope it's not a farce. No matter how this plays out, I just hope that justice is served. All eyes will be watching."</i><br /><br />I am right there with Lynette. I really hope this isn't a bunch of bullshit and he won't serve any time. But I am AMAZED that he is being charged with murder. He deserves nothing less, but I thought that wouldn't happen.ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-23371992548546873472009-01-12T22:07:00.001-08:002009-01-12T22:07:55.012-08:00Oh, make me over...Today I began my new life. Which sounds like a really dramatic way to say "I started beauty school" but it's not actually dramatic, just true. Since I graduated from college in 1997 I have worked at one job or another or another or another as a waiterretailclerkqualityassurancetesterofficmanager and dealt with the dissatisfaction that all the iterations of that life can bring. Today I began my first day of schooling to change what I do with my professional life and it fucking rocked. Seriously, even going over the student manual was engaging. I can't believe I get to spend this year learning and learning and learning all of this new stuff. I feel really lucky and excited and intimidated and giddy and thrilled. <br /><br />And tired, good lord. I was sick all last week and this weekend with a cold-turned-sinus infection and last night I could hardly fall asleep on time due to nerves and excitement. Thankfully orientation day was fairly low-impact and I had a wonderful appointment with my acupuncturist afterward and she loaded me up with natural remedies and gave me a good, long needling session. In my extra-budgeted life this year I really want to make my splurges on these kinds of things as opposed to meals out or cute clothes, which we all know I love. I'm gonna be around students and teachers and clients all the time so I'd rather splash out on wellness and preventative treatments than frivolous crap. That said, if anyone wants to gift me with an iPod Nano or something (my old iPod died a sad death a few months back) to make the bus rides more joyful, I would not be all pious and say no to it. Also, I actually don't expect anyone to buy me that. Maybe just Jesus.<br /><br />I have a feeling I won't be on here or other interweb places nearly as much this year since I won't have any time/access at school. But I actually don't think that's bad in any way. And this is secretly my favorite "beauty" song there is, no matter how cheesy that may be. Do you think Courtney even remembers being this Courtney?<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/mfT3n_vSnso&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/mfT3n_vSnso&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-58929050793053755092009-01-08T10:52:00.001-08:002009-01-08T10:52:37.344-08:00Thoughts on BART ShootingI'm a little surprised that I haven't seen anyone on my LJ friends list writing about <a href=http://news.google.com/news?q=bart%20shooting&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&tab=wn Target="_New"><b>the fatal shooting of Oscar Grant by BART police on January 1st</a></b> and the resulting protest/riot last night. I'm not saying that in an admonishing way, but more like I tend to see some folks writing about that stuff on my f-list. At any rate, I've been reading a lot about it and watched the news coverage about the protests and an upcoming BART meeting open to the public this morning. The <a href=http://www.ktvu.com/news/18434205/detail.html#- Target="_New"><b>video footage</b></a> is particularly intense and damning and it's really hard for me to wrap my mind around why Johannes Mesherle (the cop who shot Grant) thought pulling out his gun was necessary at all. Especially when he had a taser on his hip as well. Mind you, most folks are saying it was unnecessary for him to draw ANY weapon, but the gun is so excessive and extreme. Said cop has <a href=http://www.eastbayexpress.com/blogs/bart_cop_resigns/Content?oid=900768 Target="_New"><b>resigned from his job with BART</b></a> but he is keeping close-lipped about the incident. Why he hasn't been arrested or brought in for questioning when the police managed to arrest 100+ people at the riot/protest last night is beyond me.<br /><br />The whole incident is like a horrifying combination of <a href=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rodney_King Target="_New"><b>Rodney King</b></a> and <a href=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amadou_Diallo Target="_New"><b>Amadou Diallo</b></a> and it seems likely that the meager amounts of justice dealt out in those situations will be mirrored in this one. As I got ready for work this morning and listened to the news stories I thought about how many foolish blog posts I read around and after the election implying that Obama's victory would somehow erase not only present day racism but the scars of slavery and racism's violent past in this country. And then something like this happens and it all comes crashing back just how untrue those hopeful, naive statements were. And, sure, people will argue that race has nothing to do with this shooting but honestly, how many more unarmed black men need to be shot in this country before we stop dusting off that old, tired argument?<br /><br />I always feel a little naive when I am surprised or horrified by situations like this - like I should expect them and be numb to them. But somehow I am always dumbfounded by how horrible shit like this can keep happening and happening.ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-4399763325102994582009-01-06T12:44:00.001-08:002009-01-06T12:44:38.594-08:00Awesome<a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3169333017/sizes/o/ Target="_New"><img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3258/3169333017_6df6574d4c.jpg></a><br />(Click for larger)<br /><br />Going back in for a touch up appointment soon to finish off the helmet and redo any black parts that need it. But it's SO FUCKING GOOD!!! Once again, all praise to <a href=http://www.blackandbluetattoo.com/artists/clio/ Target="_New"><b>Clio at Black & Blue Tattoo</b></a> for her amazing work. She has officially graduated from apprentice to full-on artist at the studio and, clearly, does fantastic work. Go see her!ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-49302741285241472602009-01-06T12:30:00.000-08:002009-01-06T12:32:04.505-08:00Ex-Boyfriends @ The Elbo Room 1/23/09!We're playing the launch party for the SF Indie Fest at the Elbo Room on 1/23/09 so come and check us out!! <br /><br /><a href=http://www.ex-bf.com/shows/index.php Target="_New"><img src=http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1040/3174962040_7cc4bc2583.jpg></a><br /><br /><a href="http://www.ex-bf.com/shows/index.php" target="_New">SF IndieFest Presents<br />A Benefit/Launch Party for the<br />11th San Francisco Independent Film Festival<br />Fri Jan 23, 9p<br />with <br />Shotgun Wedding Quintet - 11:30<br />Ex-Boyfriends - 10:30<br />Pollo Del Mar - 9:30<br />Plus Festival Previews</a><br /><br />At Elbo Room, 647 Valencia at 17th<br />21up, $10, all proceeds benefit the <a href="http://www.sfindie.com" target="_New">SF IndieFest</a>ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-6275939711565095562009-01-05T00:44:00.001-08:002009-01-05T00:48:02.042-08:00Timely/Hilarious<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhelQxsQC09DUeZ_e95jA5MaiMtUYNl9mEQwFCSLl6rlxy13rEofJj-1sqieYGHI_l7wbfk2S_X_xMUbcn_3KQknro95UKGw75PoBLM-UzDlMFb9ggmh9310jvaSpBgxbD-Z4_h6w/s1600-h/just-here-to-cut-hair.gif"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 307px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhelQxsQC09DUeZ_e95jA5MaiMtUYNl9mEQwFCSLl6rlxy13rEofJj-1sqieYGHI_l7wbfk2S_X_xMUbcn_3KQknro95UKGw75PoBLM-UzDlMFb9ggmh9310jvaSpBgxbD-Z4_h6w/s400/just-here-to-cut-hair.gif" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5287728683894582242" /></a><br /><a href="http://marriedtothesea.com/">marriedtothesea.com</a>ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-9501380513135002442009-01-02T01:37:00.000-08:002009-01-02T01:38:12.612-08:00New Year's Eve in Photos<a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3155329539/in/set-72157611947294847/ Target="_New"><img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3215/3155329539_140edbd7cd_m.jpg></a><br /><br /><a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3156163918/in/set-72157611947294847/ Target="_New"><img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3086/3156163918_9326edcba4_m.jpg></a><br /><br /><a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3156164030/in/set-72157611947294847/ Target="_New"><img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3209/3156164030_056737fa5e_m.jpg></a><br /><br /><a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3155329651/in/set-72157611947294847/ Target="_New"><img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3288/3155329651_107bf0dc39_m.jpg></a><br /><br /><a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3156165424/in/set-72157611947294847/ Target="_New"><img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3098/3156165424_8cdfde0e1a_m.jpg></a><br /><br /><a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3156165346/in/set-72157611947294847/ Target="_New"><img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3242/3156165346_4a277aeee2_m.jpg></a><br /><br /><a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3156165294/in/set-72157611947294847/ Target="_New"><img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3098/3156165294_6384079294_m.jpg></a><br /><br /><a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3155332933/in/set-72157611947294847/ Target="_New"><img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3296/3155332933_d5254808a0_m.jpg></a>ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-57114566188600378632008-12-21T01:47:00.000-08:002008-12-21T02:47:56.600-08:00Year in ReviewBy all standards 2008 was the hardest year of my adult life. In January, my relationship of 3 and a 1/2 years to my boyfriend Ryan ended and I moved out of our place (we'd lived together for almost 2 and a 1/2 years) and in with a new roommate. As I adjusted to this new situation and the inevitable whirlpool of emotions around it my Dad continued to deteriorate as a result of the terminal lung cancer he was diagnosed with in November 2007. He left this world on September 29, 2008 and in some ways it's like time has been put both into slow-motion and high speed fast-forward. With every passing day it sinks in a bit more that the world I live in has not been and will never be the same now that he isn't in it. The ripples of his death resonate in ways that I think I've only begun to feel. Some days it's like I can't accept his absence without feeling like a gaping abyss is opening up beneath me and it will suck me in forever. Other days it's as if everything is the same as it always was. After all, I didn't see my Dad all that often with him living in Florida and all. But when I really look at the world around me closely it isn't the same. Everything is slightly off - the colors wrong, the objects ever so fractionally out of place. And that is how they'll always be until I adjust to the world without my father in it and it becomes my new reality. <br /><br />In this new world, so many situations that would have seemed cliche now reveal themselves as a natural part of grieving. The saying "you learn who your friends really are" when applied to times of difficulty is 100% completely true. I saw friends who I mostly thought of as "social" friends rally around me during my Dad's death and support me in ways I never imagined they would. I watched as people I thought I was close to drifted away, possibly unable to deal with the difficulty of death. I was reunited with one friend whom I'd fallen out with a few years ago and our friendship both picked up where it had left off and quickly moved forward as both of us had grown and changed so much since our falling out. She came back into my life right as my Dad was nearing his end and she offered up much support without hesitation or a thought for anything that had been difficult between us in the past. At the same time I finally let go of trying to maintain a one-sided, frustrating friendship with someone who loved to call me part of her "family" yet became so increasingly self-involved and invested in being a professional victim that she couldn't even muster a few words of comfort or support for either my breakup or the death of my father. In both situations I was 100% true to myself and chose my paths very consciously. I'm thrilled to have my former friend back and, frankly, relieved to be done with the other. I have no time to suffer fools and anyone who can't spare an iota of their energy in one of my most difficult periods is no friend of mine.<br /><br />So all of this must seem pretty grim. And yet, as the year draws to a close, I often find myself feeling better than I have in months and months. I still miss my father desperately and I know that is nowhere near ending. But instead of letting everything that's happened this year pull me into some bottomless pit of despair I keep pushing forward into the future, making decisions about my life that focus on progress and personal and professional growth. When I need to put the brakes on and spend the day sitting around in my pajamas watching DVDs and sitting with feelings of loss and loneliness and melancholy, I do just that. I sit with it. It doesn't define and inform my entire existence and I make no decisions based on it. And then the next day or the day after that I stand up, shower off those gray hours and keep walking forward even when the steps feel heavy and uncertain. I don't write this to brag or to present myself as invincible or to get sympathy for being some long suffering victim. I write this to remind myself when I feel completely the opposite of invincible that each day ends and the experiences of that day are as finite as anything else. I remind myself of the last ten years where my Dad and I had the best relationship we'd ever had. I remember the times Ryan and I were truly happy. I think about all the great music I've been lucky enough to help make. I think of all the fantastic songs in the world and how I get to listen to them whenever I want. I think of friends present and past and how each one of them played some role in me being where I am today and how much I cherish and have cherished them. And I remember that every year ends, even the hardest one so far.ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-82698245139573269992008-12-15T13:02:00.001-08:002008-12-15T13:02:41.696-08:00"I don't think I'll wake her. I'll just sleep with my pearl-handled Beretta"Wow, do you remember this?<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/2RiDufTQb7k&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/2RiDufTQb7k&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-58028881998149871802008-12-11T16:57:00.000-08:002008-12-11T17:05:18.173-08:00"Maybe tomorrow, maybe someday..."I've been so busy between work and trying to get finances together for beauty school and trying not to let the tides of grieving for my Dad pull me under that I seem to neglect this blog more and more. I'll often push the button to start a post and stare at the blank box with an equally blank mind. It's like there's so many things swirling around in my brain that I can't put anything down in a sensible way. <br /><br />When this happens to me I tend to try and lose myself in music and let it wash over me, bringing some kind of succor. The song "Talk of the Town" by The Pretenders is my favorite song by them as well as one of my favorite songs, period. It's full of perfectly crafted pop brilliance and enough wistful melancholia to fill me with both a sense of longing and a feeling of being lifted up. So it's pretty perfect for right now.<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/nYbtLXxS2zI&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/nYbtLXxS2zI&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-27724022986856166222008-12-08T01:13:00.000-08:002008-12-08T01:16:41.632-08:00The Wisdom of AthenaI just got 3/4 of a new tattoo done today! I'll be going back in a few weeks to fill in the black night sky, some black on the shield and helmet, the owl detail and the outer frame. I am SO happy with it already!! It might be the endorphins from getting tattooed, but I am in the best mood I've been in for months. I ran all the way up the hill from the bus and could barely keep from yelling out in excitement as I walked home. Thank goodness for new ink!<br /><br /><a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3092355252/ Target="_New"><img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3027/3092355252_f12e0800b1.jpg></a><br /><br /><a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3091516397/ Target="_New"><img src=http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3013/3091516397_9291080202.jpg></a><br /><br />Original artwork <a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohnochriso/3086568238/ Target="_New"><b>here</b></a>. All praise to Clio at <a href=http://www.blackandbluetattoo.com/home/ Target="_New"><b>Black & Blue Tattoo</b></a>. She may be "only" an apprentice but her work speaks for itself and it says "FUCKING AWESOME!!!"ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-41130483086186851722008-12-03T08:15:00.000-08:002008-12-03T08:27:40.443-08:00Ice QueenIt's pretty much a given that I will make a post every few months (or weeks) with fabulous photos of Siouxsie Sioux that I find on the web. You can either bask or move on, but you're life is less awesome if you do the latter.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEgtq-54NBOUO5WsZGt-k75IJT10cOfXVKYnjE8X5eJNmbEW_0zKXRNrr6sKvfzqxAy4GVVNxdKHD0qRTzxmPTw516CxvSmUepA105kdVtHvE3doRbuz4h32xu-2NcH0A5QfMoFQ/s1600-h/Sheila_071218102653343_wideweb__300x333.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 333px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEgtq-54NBOUO5WsZGt-k75IJT10cOfXVKYnjE8X5eJNmbEW_0zKXRNrr6sKvfzqxAy4GVVNxdKHD0qRTzxmPTw516CxvSmUepA105kdVtHvE3doRbuz4h32xu-2NcH0A5QfMoFQ/s400/Sheila_071218102653343_wideweb__300x333.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5275598674994963602" /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgttM36D5_trQL2MlNQEdg4ofoC0BNJz4IwdngKKFtlxAa0JP-Fcpftz2kD3w15N2taYkZqxuoPUQoJGKjAPRv0nvNeSlbG-6tgxuT3cOmaeAWgXrOP3eh40MXNl-kaLYNtdE0huw/s1600-h/post-43-1103705004.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 275px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgttM36D5_trQL2MlNQEdg4ofoC0BNJz4IwdngKKFtlxAa0JP-Fcpftz2kD3w15N2taYkZqxuoPUQoJGKjAPRv0nvNeSlbG-6tgxuT3cOmaeAWgXrOP3eh40MXNl-kaLYNtdE0huw/s400/post-43-1103705004.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5275599052682236722" /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVnPBBHfVp65uNGIKszbYOH4sHdO3AmFR9ovztv4VEeZDvPH_VyVeH3P-vQaYdmQ4nVsuKZKI5LJ1gznC1lix8QtoUXF4ROrsZ-_zt-RJHJO28EAvhXyjnio5Vww4dsKnFCn70ug/s1600-h/114536_main.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVnPBBHfVp65uNGIKszbYOH4sHdO3AmFR9ovztv4VEeZDvPH_VyVeH3P-vQaYdmQ4nVsuKZKI5LJ1gznC1lix8QtoUXF4ROrsZ-_zt-RJHJO28EAvhXyjnio5Vww4dsKnFCn70ug/s400/114536_main.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5275599389128598370" /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoLQJPvO8H1dmfOcDJpnvEto7Q4bpecNBugKzE-AGDM001bMTn__Viv5aS1i-4Iq_U3Ic2gdwSf7WBRCMYRCmMFGFBz-R4LWgyDh4eNGvPoRGlebK6KhoT1IblOOMaJtBl08uiew/s1600-h/0869_171557_siouxsieRE090608.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 368px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoLQJPvO8H1dmfOcDJpnvEto7Q4bpecNBugKzE-AGDM001bMTn__Viv5aS1i-4Iq_U3Ic2gdwSf7WBRCMYRCmMFGFBz-R4LWgyDh4eNGvPoRGlebK6KhoT1IblOOMaJtBl08uiew/s400/0869_171557_siouxsieRE090608.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5275599643051246386" /></a><br /><br />I found these following images on <a href=http://www.flickr.com/photos/digitalhuckle/ Target="_New"><b>Digitalhuckle's Flickr page</b></a>. I love the way they span from androgyny to exaggerated femininity and Siouxsie works them all. <br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhINGF-6CXilEWPjkCsySwkUSNwvU86gtEkLTZS9kWQqQcnD5IYWqpDXijfi0jE0QM2lLnyo4WR7itlvLrP2fw-mlSkbCLdaZfBCOl2et2UGJM0sDuKw4ji7enDuvfGMDc08Tfvqw/s1600-h/siouxsiefromdigitalhuckle03.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 303px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhINGF-6CXilEWPjkCsySwkUSNwvU86gtEkLTZS9kWQqQcnD5IYWqpDXijfi0jE0QM2lLnyo4WR7itlvLrP2fw-mlSkbCLdaZfBCOl2et2UGJM0sDuKw4ji7enDuvfGMDc08Tfvqw/s400/siouxsiefromdigitalhuckle03.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5275600163699098994" /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghvQx5FOE5cW0ZTavzIML9tsfQEb_0EaPPNXVlnI31J8_ZuLNJYGVKa4RHu-MhE9CtlkbC1R9fALjcfZLf7LSeqwomGguHHDj8SgGT_R09_dbfW3O5kl0s_ACYYv7AxF7KRL8png/s1600-h/siouxsiefromdigitalhuckle02.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 216px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghvQx5FOE5cW0ZTavzIML9tsfQEb_0EaPPNXVlnI31J8_ZuLNJYGVKa4RHu-MhE9CtlkbC1R9fALjcfZLf7LSeqwomGguHHDj8SgGT_R09_dbfW3O5kl0s_ACYYv7AxF7KRL8png/s400/siouxsiefromdigitalhuckle02.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5275600288710868978" /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiobFYcWlSrXuf9pl1oB5i5DkAioOor6Z-jxFj8wmyD5LOFJKwSweEqUCXOQS0zTTbAiyu1Rdc16bFbRlY6-jLTWu3Rkus_KPqei5g3AStyGCbTtBp5q4czEfIcV1lGMDxVoXJn_A/s1600-h/siouxsiefromdigitalhuckle.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 287px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiobFYcWlSrXuf9pl1oB5i5DkAioOor6Z-jxFj8wmyD5LOFJKwSweEqUCXOQS0zTTbAiyu1Rdc16bFbRlY6-jLTWu3Rkus_KPqei5g3AStyGCbTtBp5q4czEfIcV1lGMDxVoXJn_A/s400/siouxsiefromdigitalhuckle.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5275600403078067058" /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5mx1MZpE3F6v8Em3XeTwGk0uKuRm6pFH2XBpZz9KPmrJzcO_cl88wlwNpiN7IzZTBKgQKxk92r8OO0LlAiNDrBoGID3bw8T76_Lw_TcbmkhMOZcMxXdxVwoSEQlzPgHPyq3Bl9w/s1600-h/siouxsiefromdigitalhuckle04.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 291px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5mx1MZpE3F6v8Em3XeTwGk0uKuRm6pFH2XBpZz9KPmrJzcO_cl88wlwNpiN7IzZTBKgQKxk92r8OO0LlAiNDrBoGID3bw8T76_Lw_TcbmkhMOZcMxXdxVwoSEQlzPgHPyq3Bl9w/s400/siouxsiefromdigitalhuckle04.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5275600513160352786" /></a><br /><br />And here is the Siouxsie & The Banshees song I am currently obsessed with.<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/sEezx76Ie54&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/sEezx76Ie54&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-8457588832049948452008-12-02T09:00:00.000-08:002008-12-02T09:00:00.298-08:00Teen DramaticThe first guy I ever "dated" was a drama major at Emerson College named David. He was friends and schoolmates with my best friend Sarah and we fooled around once during one of my weekend visits to Boston. Nothing really happened between us for months and months after messing around, but I got it in my head that I was madly crushed out on him. Mind you, I was actually madly crushed out on a "straight" high school classmate of mine named Hubie, but I was deeply in denial about it. Hubie and I would hang out endlessly and fall asleep on his dorm room bed in the middle of the evening. Well, he would sleep. I would lay next to him holding my breath, hoping he'd nudge his leg against mine one more time. <br /><br />As Hubie and I hurtled toward an inexorable climax of sorts in our relationship, I somehow managed to start "dating" David, who had now graduated from Emerson and lived in New York City. I don't even remember how it happened, but our relationship mainly revolved around our telephones and mailboxes. We'd have long conversations that involved me curling up on the bench in the dorm room phone booth as we blathered on about anything and everything. I remember loving the time I spent in the phone booth talking to him - it was terribly romantic and seemed like exactly the kind of thing two lovestruck youths should be doing with their spare time. The epistolary side of our relationship was even more flushed with giddy, gushy, love-ness. David would write me these long, poetic letters with dark, vampire-ish, theater major overtones and send me little gifts along with them. One such gift came in the form of a mix tape that contained a ton of songs I forget and one song that stood out from all of the others: "Pearly Dewdrops' Drops" by <a href="http://www.cocteautwins.com/" target="_New"><b>The Cocteau Twins</b></a>. I'd never heard a song like it in my life. And even though I couldn't understand a fucking word Elizabeth Fraser was singing, the song spoke to me on some visceral level. It filled with me with longing and melancholy and I was sure it was about someone as tortured, lovelorn and angst-ridden as me, and I played it until I wore out the tape. <br /><br />Eventually, I went to visit David during a round of visits to some NYC-area colleges. I remember this really emotionally contained goodbye I had with Hubie where we joked about being a married couple having to separate for a vacation and then shared a too-long, too-tight hug. But it was nothing compared to how emotionally unprepared I was for having A Boyfriend in the Big City. After spending 24 hours with David I fled back to the apartment of a friend I was also visiting in Brooklyn and broke up with him via phone. It was a cowardly thing to do but I was 18 and he scared the crap out of me the way he seemed to want to devour me whole. I guess all of that intensity was fine over the phone or in letter form. But in person? In New York City? It was more than my naive little self could handle. I returned to New Hampshire and my barely-concealed object of love. It wasn't long before Hubie and I finally fooled around and, right afterward, he became distant and detached and found a new best friend; a girl this time. Even though I can look at that whole time with heaping spoonfuls of bemusement, the song that I associate the most with that whole period still works its magic on me as if I were 18. Although it holds more of a wistful, transcendent tone than it did back in my drama-laden days of yore. I still have no clue what in the world she's singing about. But I think I like it better that way.<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/9-hSQBaSf-0&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/9-hSQBaSf-0&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-85479845630226451292008-11-25T22:08:00.000-08:002008-11-25T22:09:07.798-08:00ACCEPTED!!!<font size="5">I GOT ACCEPTED INTO THE COSMETOLOGY PROGRAM AT THE AVEDA INSTITUTE!!!!!!!</font><br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/rJdVzc1Jhfc&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/rJdVzc1Jhfc&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />I meet with the Director of Admissions on Tuesday to work out a financial plan and, from there, pick my start date!!!ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10222053.post-13632387137230547992008-11-24T17:15:00.001-08:002008-11-24T17:27:50.086-08:00No GuiltI was talking to my pal Ron on IM about musical guilty pleasures and I said <b>"I generally feel no guilt about any music because if it brings me some kind of joy or pleasure or catharsis or whatever, then it's good to me."</b> When I was younger, about college age, I discovered punk rock/indie/underground music and spent some time being very concerned with the credibility of my music collection. The beloved Bananarama albums and 12" remix vinyl got pushed to the side in favor of Bikini Kill and Huggy Bear, the Voice of the Beehive, Mary's Danish and Shakespear's Sister CDs got shelved behind Superchunk, Unrest and Versus discs while I made sure that my record collection reflected the fact that I was <b>Punk/Indie Since Birth</b> and had never trifled with such pop confections or uncool song choices.<br /><br />Thankfully, that period of time was short-lived and soon my many musical loves, cool or uncool, merged together in one collection and Keren, Sarah and Siobhan sat proudly alongside Kathleen Hanna and hundreds of others spanning the many genres of music I love. From then on I've really had a hard time mustering any guilt for any music I've enjoyed, whether it's been fleeting or long term. I went through a period in the late 90s where I really enjoyed the second Sheryl Crow album and played it as much as I played my beloved first Team Dresch album. I got sick of it eventually but I still sing along with songs from it if I hear them out in the world. Two weeks ago I couldn't get enough of these four Mariah Carey tracks I always enjoyed when I heard them on the radio so I found them on Limewire, downloaded them and played the fuck out of them for about 7 days straight. Do I think these are some of the best songs written in the world? No. Do I think they're loaded with substance and depth and rich meaning? Also, no. But are they well-crafted pop songs that bring me some kind of enjoyment for a moment or two? Yes, indeed.<br /><br />Music is my most favorite form of art, bar none. It's a populist art form that anyone can access and enjoy. It's both incredibly personal and totally public in the same moment. A song can have intense, almost sacred meaning to someone as they play it alone in their room and then can explode with cathartic revelry when it's experienced in a live venue full of eager, excited fans. In the same way, a goofy, manufactured pop song can make you dance around like a maniac and have a lot of fun all on your own or with a group of people, sweating and singing and loving every sugary minute of it. And this can all be done guilt-free. Guilt is one of the most pointless emotions in existence, especially when it comes to music. If you're guilty about music you love or pretend you don't to everyone but yourself then you care too damn much about what people think and about your "cred" in some elitist music scene. Sure, I might not have a lot of respect for someone who loves the hell out of some Alan Jackson 9/11 song but if they love it then they love it and there's nothing I can do about it. That's the beauty of music: no one is going to love every song ever written and what may be someone's most treasured tune may make someone else wish they were earless. But, no matter what, you should never feel guilty for loving the music you love. You should just play it as loud as you want and let it work its magic on you.ohnochrisohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00665155622284481237noreply@blogger.com1